Guest Blogger David Goldstein

I love going out for a meal. It is one of the few pleasures in life I still enjoy. I use to go to the movies, attend huge amounts of Phillies and Flyers games each season, and go to the bookstore to browse. I’ve been to one Phillies game this season and we still go to the bookstore (mostly to take the kids,) but I really don’t enjoy it. (I haven’t been to the movies in over two years and really miss it. See my post Missing the Movies.) I do still love eating and do so four or five times a day.

Of course, dining out poses some challenges if you can’t see very well or at all; mainly, what to order. When we decide we’re going out for a meal, I will go to the restaurant’s website and have a look at the menu and, if available, the nutritional information. Since I budget my calories, I pick a couple of things just in case they’re out of my first choice when we get to the restaurant. When we go out on the spur of the moment, my wife or one of the kids will read the menu to me.

Another challenge is getting to and using the bathroom. If we’re eating at a restaurant that we’ve been to before, that isn’t an issue. If it is new to us, however, my wife or one of my kids will walk me over to it. I have to tell you, I have a fear of walking into the women’s restroom.

Then there is this Ònear miss.Ó We were dining at California Pizza Kitchen at the Christiana Mall. We’ve been there multiple times. While we were waiting for our food, I decided to use the restroom. I knew where it was and the restaurant wasn’t too busy so I was confident that I could navigate to it on my own. I was successful getting there and doing my business, but I had a little trouble on my return to our table. My son had a green shirt on and was facing in the direction of the bathroom. I knew to look for his green shirt to find our table.

You can probably guess what happened. Unbeknownst to me, the man sitting directly behind me also had a green shirt on. I didn’t see him when I got up and walked toward the bathroom, but I did see him on my return to our table. He was sitting in the same spot as my son, one table closer to the bathroom. I almost sat his table. The only thing that stopped me was the amount of plates on their table. They had just finished eating, so there were multiple plates. Since we were still waiting for our food, our table only had our drinks. I would have been pretty embarrassed had I sat at the wrong table, though I may have made a new friend and tried some new food.

Eating with utensils is another challenge, but I have that wherever I eat, I just can’t use my fingers at a restaurant. Believe me, if I get frustrated enough I’ll use my fingers at a restaurant too. Those of us with sight issues are challenged by many things in our daily lives that people with sight can’t even imagine. It is something we have to deal with and manage to succeed. By the way, the next time you are at a restaurant, look around. If you spot me dining near by, order an iced tea with extra lemons just in case I join you.

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Want more? Check out my blog at www.iCantCU.com

I just returned home from Affiliate Summit East in New York City. Affiliate Summit is an internet marketing conference that includes education sessions as well as an exhibit floor where companies chat up their products and services. Due to my limited eye sight, show management was kind enough to provide me with an additional show pass for my wife to assist me at the conference. She takes notes at the education sessions and guides me around the exhibit floor.

The harder part of the two tasks is walking around the exhibits. The floor can be quite crowded. As we walk by the booths, she’ll tell me the name of the company. There were times when we got separated because of the traffic. Only one of those times did it lead to a collision. A man came from my right and I didn’t see him at all. While I have limited vision in my left eye, my right eye is useless, making my right my blindside. Literally. That is why when we walk, my wife is on my right.

My nose hit his bicep and I stepped on his left foot. While I wasn’t hurt, I was embarrassed and frustrated. It wasn’t a little tap. At about 6’1″, he’s probably wondering how I didn’t see him. After I apologized to him I was able to catch up to my wife. From that point on I made more of an effort to stick close behind her. It was just too crowded to walk side by side.

At the education sessions, I listen carefully while my wife takes notes from the PowerPoint presentation. I sometimes got lost when the speaker was referring to a slide and talking about it, but didn’t actually read what was on the slide. I have loathed slideshows and overhead projectors since I was in elementary school. Even when my sight was better than it is now, I always had trouble seeing them. The nice thing about Affiliate Summit is that all the sessions are recorded on video and the PowerPoint presentations are made available at a later date. I’ll be able to view them once they’re posted. In the meantime, my wife will type up her notes so that I can read them.

I really enjoyed Affiliate Summit and learned a great deal of information from the various sessions and keynote speeches. It is not comfortable for me to walk around a crowded exhibit floor or sit in an education session and try to follow the speaker’s movements, but to learn and grow you have to step out of your comfort zone. My hope is that the more I do it, the more comfortable I’ll become.

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Want more? Check out my blog at www.iCantCU.com

With the release of the final Harry Potter movie this summer and all the hype that came with it, I was thinking how much I miss going to the movies. We use to go several times a month. I love movies so much that the first business I owned was a West Coast Video store franchise. My wife and I quote movies so often in our every day lives that our daughter gets mad at us, since she has no idea what we’re talking about most of the time.

I haven?t been inside a movie theater for about two years. I stopped going because it was too frustrating for me. I couldn?t see what was going on the screen. I?d ask my wife and she?d fill me in, but it got to the point that she?d almost have to give me a play-by-play for me to know what was happening.

I first gave up going to action/adventure movies and most sci-fi and fantasy films because of the quick movement on the screen and my inability to follow along. I was okay with that, since I could still follow along on comedies as long as there wasn?t too much physical or visual humor. I knew it was time to stop going to see them when I went with my son and a friend to see The Hangover. My wife didn?t go and I didn?t sit with my son so I wouldn?t cramp his style. That was the last comedy I saw at the movies. It was too frustrating listening to the audience laugh and I had no idea why.

My wife convinced me to give it one more try. She and I went to see Julie & Julia. I had such trouble following along that I knew that was probably the last movie I?d see at the movies. I still watch movies on DVD and cable, but it isn?t the same as seeing it on the big screen.

A few weeks ago, while traveling, we considered going to the movies one night. While looking online at the choices at the megaplex closest to our hotel I noticed something that said DVS. I looked around the internet and found that it stands for Descriptive Video Services. It basically describes what is happening visually on the screen. Turns out we didn?t go the movies on our trip that night, but when we got home I searched for a theater close by that might offer it. Sadly, the closest offering was about 35 miles away. Another downer was that not all movies playing at that theater had DVS.

So while I haven?t been to a movie theater in over two years, I am more hopeful now that it soon could happen. Sure, it will take a 70 mile round trip and we?ll pass at least a dozen movie theaters on the way. And it might not be my first, second, or third choice, but it will be a movie on the big screen. I wish we could go right now.

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Want more? Check out my blog at www.iCantCU.com

I drink a lot.  No, not alcohol, mainly water.  Usually between two to three liters per day.  I supplement that with a mug of herbal tea in the morning and a trenta iced tea in the afternoon.  So, at various times throughout the day, I gotta go.

There are times when we are out making a delivery for our beauty supply business, or traveling, or out shopping, that I’ve got to use a public bathroom.  That is where the challenge begins for me.  Small, single-person bathrooms like those at Starbucks are usually not a problem for me.  I go in, turn on the light, do my business, wash my hands, figure out how to get the paper towels out, and exit.  These bathrooms may have an auto-flush toilet, but the sinks usually have to be manually turned on and off.  The paper towel unit is the most difficult thing to work for me in these bathrooms.  Sometimes they’re automatic and you just wave your hand in front to get a towel to come out.  Other units have a lever on the front of the unit that you pull down.  Some others have a wheel on the side that you spin to get the towel out.  Figuring out which type of unit it is, is my problem, but since there is no one else in there, I don’t feel uncomfortable figuring it out.

Then there are those large public bathrooms found in malls, hotels, rest stops on the highway, etc.  These are all very different.  The urinals are all pretty similar, with most now being automatic flush.  The sinks vary though.  Some are auto, while others have to be turned on manually.  This has posed a problem in the past.  Sometimes I cannot tell if there is a handle to turn the water on and I’ll just place my hands under the faucet.  After about 10 seconds I start to wonder if it’s manual and I’m not seeing the handle or it’s automatic and I don’t have my hands in the sweet spot.  I give it another five seconds and if water isn’t flowing, I feel for a handle.  This past summer, while traveling with my family, I went to wash my hands and water didn’t come out.  I felt for a handle and there wasn’t one.  I began to wonder if there was hidden cameras watching me try to figure out how to get the sink to work.  I went to another sink.  Nothing.  Then, on the third sink I tried, success!

Of course, my problem with these public bathrooms aren’t the bathrooms, they’re with me.  I don’t want to look or feel stupid doing what, for most, is a simple task of washing your hands or getting a paper towel to dry them.  Sooner or later I’ve got to learn to not worry about what others think, complete the task, and move on.

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Want more?  Check out my blog at www.iCantCU.com or follow me on twitter @davidbenj

We had very nice weather on Saturday, so my wife, daughter, and I went to Suburban Square in Ardmore, PA for lunch and some shopping. Suburban Square is an outdoor shopping area with local and national branded stores and restaurants. Unfortunately, we weren’t the only ones who had the idea to have a look around.

Being legally blind, crowded areas make things a bit more difficult for me to navigate. Some of the sidewalks around Suburban Square are narrow and have cutouts with trees. Other sidewalks have parking meters, telephone poles, and assorted signposts. Since there was only enough room for us to walk single-file, I couldn’t hold my wife’s or daughter’s hand. Couple that with all the shadows from the trees, poles, buildings, and whatnot, a leisurely walk was anything but for me. I walked behind my wife or daughter and tried to avoid the cutouts with the trees, the poles, the people, and the shops’ doors, which I did, but my concentration level was about as great as that of a tightrope walker 100 feet up on a windy day. It was a huge relief when we were on a wide sidewalk and I could hold my wife’s hand.

While walking hand in hand with my wife, I started thinking if it might be time to learn how to use one of those white canes. I’ve never liked the idea of having to use one. I’m not comfortable with the attention it would draw to me. It would make me different from just about everyone else. I’ve always wanted to just fit in.

Of course, some of the attention it would draw to me might not be a bad thing. I’d certainly get the benefit of the doubt when I bumped into someone. People would probably get out of my way when they see me coming too. I just don’t think I’m ready for it yet.

Want more? Check out my blog at www.iCantCU.com

Like the previous eight or nine springs, we’ve decided to plant a vegetable and herb garden. When we started, I planted only a few things and used those old whiskey barrels (my wife and I still laugh when we think about bringing those home from the store, with all the windows in the SUV opened because of the intense smell of whiskey in the car.) The barrels were easy to plant and maintain. We’d plant a zucchini plant in one barrel, a tomato plant and jalapeno pepper plant in another, and basil, rosemary, and few other herbs in the third barrel. That worked okay until we wanted more veggies.

We’ve been planting a full garden for the past six years. It is more work, but we get a whole bunch more veggies to eat and share. Memorial Day Weekend is usually the weekend that I plant everything. We need that extra day to recover… My wife and I work as a team. She weeds and clears out any plants still left from the previous year. I till the soil and do the planting. (The kids stay inside and enjoy the air conditioning. They’re not interested in planting or eating veggies.)

I usually have a fear and an aversion to using any kind of power tool because of my lack of sight. For some reason I don’t have that with the Mantis tiller. I am happy to report that I still have all my digits and there were no incidents again this year. That’s six for six! I till the soil and then have my wife have a look to see if I’ve missed any spots. Having my wife (or anyone else) check my work usually bothers me, but for this it doesn’t seem like a big deal. It must be the euphoria of not bleeding or not feeling pain from an injury caused by the tiller that makes me forget to be annoyed.

Once I get the spots in the garden I missed with the tiller, I get my wife again to help with the layout. She tells me what the plants are and checks my placement. We want the spacing to spot on. Once the placement is done, I dig the holes, drop in the plants, then water them all. I enjoy planting the garden with all the bugs crawling on me, the loud noise of the tiller running, the smell of dehydrated cow maneur, and the sun beating down on me. I enjoy it because I can do most of the work on my own, I can’t say that about many other things.

Want more? Check out my blog at www.iCantCU.com